Both Sides of the Coin: Acknowledging Both Positive and Negative Experiences with the Hijab

Introduction

In a world where the media overshadows the voices of minorites, it is no surprise that the hijab has become a hot topic, often misunderstood and nearly always followed by some negative comment; "Muslim women are oppressed", "the hijab restrics women from living life", "they only wear it to please the men in their lives", and as we know, the list goes on forever. The reality is, for many women, their relationship with the hijab is negative and we cannot deny their truth, we must recognize them, but on the otherhand, many woman have very positive experiences with the hijab. How do we ensure that the hijab is not misunderstood while ensuring that both positive and negative experiences are given the spotlight, given a chance to be heard?

Fighting the False Narratives

For those of us who have had mostly positive experiences with the hijab, we rush to squash the negative narratives that the Western media screams about hijab. We are taught to defend our religion shamelessly, to be proud, to never let anyone spread missinformation, to stand up for what we believe in. What we fail to notice is that in the process, while trying to fight off the media monsters, we have silenced the voices of women who did not have a positive expereince with the hijab, becoming monsters of our own. Let's be real, too many women around the world face challenges with the hijab, some more than others. It's the truth that there are women being forced to wear it, having fear instilled in them from a young age, some are being taught that muslim women should remain isolated in their homes, others restricted from things like education all in the name of the hijab. These stories deserve the same spotlight that we are giving to the women who are empowered by their hijab.

Maybe the Media is right

This hurts me to say, but what the media says about hijab, a lot of it is true, but it's just not true to everyone, focus on the word everyone for a moment. Lots of us have the privilege to say "ignore the media it's lying", but there are women out there who are saying "I hope the world can finally see my truth through the media" and we are turning away. Too many women around the world are forced to wear the hijab, many women around the world are restricted from school because "Islam does not promote educated women", a large number of women around the world have lost their lives in honor killings in the name of Islam, the stories go on forever. The same religion we follow with love is being misused to oppress women around the world. Despite a lot of the things said being true, the media is not 100% correct, not even close, so where did the media go wrong? The media has generalized some women's negative experiences to suggest that every Muslim woman in a hijab faces those same challenges, every Muslim woman hates her hijab, is wearing it by force, and needs to be saved by the Western lifestyle. Many intelligent people will come to the conclusion that the media tends to adverstise skewed and harsh narratives so we should avoid it as a primary source, but most intelligent people will also realize that not every person is going to avoid the media when it is a major part of all of our lives. Avoiding the media, I suppose, is out of the question for now. There are two things we must do; we must ensure that every voice is heard even those that don't sound like our own, and we need the rest of the world to consume media strategically.

How do we Ensure all Voices are Heard?

How do we as Muslims correct the media while ensuring every voice is heard, especially the sisters who face negative challenges with the hijab? We need to first realize that our reality is not everyone else's reality. You may have had a positive expereince with the religion, but the girl to your right might be wearing her hijab out of fear, not out of love and faith. I had a positive relationship with the hijab, I was blessed with parents who taught me what the hijab is, why it exists, and the role it will play in my life, I was given an environment that filled my heart with love for the hijab. Yet, this does not mean every woman has a positive story. I personally know many women who struggled with the hijab and ultimately removed it once free from the environement. It is our job as Muslim women to ensure that every space we create is inclusive to all Muslim women, not just those who fit our standards. We cannot look down at other Muslims simply because their story does not match ours, every story is different, when did we become the judge, jury, and executioner?

Consuming media strategically is so important. Not everyhting you hear is true, not everyhting you hear is false, and that can be so confusing, how do I know what to beleive? The good thing is, there are books, articles, and people you can use as secondary sources. When the media tells you one thing that sounds absurd always consider there may be a second or third of fourth story and it is my job to seek out the truth.

How did the Hijab get to This Point?

The hijab is a commandment from Allah, as Muslims we acknowledge that each day, but just like everything touched by mankind it has been tainted by the greed and power hungry mindsets of humans today. The hijab that was brought down to the Prophet (saw) as a means to protect the believeing women, an honourable representation of Islam, it has been consistently and strategically used to tie down Muslim women all around the world, convincing them that their oppression was comanded by God, when the truth is no such idea nor concept exists within Islam. The hijab has two forms today; its form as it was revealed by Allah, as a source of modesty both in appearance and charcater, and the form it takes today as each woman faces her own individual story. Recognizng that not all women have a positive expereince with the hijab does not take away from the true purpose of the hijab, it does not suddenly mean hijab is bad. Recognizing that humankind has ruined something as beautiful as the hijab does not go on to suggest that the hijab itself is ruined, it suggests that we need to learn to seperate a concept from those applying it. By recognizing that the hijab is not being observed the way it was intended to, we recognize the women who face the challenges and burdens placed upon them by those around them, in the name of hijab, we recognize that people are at fault, and we recognize that we have the power to bring change.

In one corner of the world we hear "take off the hijab! that's not how you wear it", and in another corner of the world we hear "don't you dare take off the hijab!" Such different views coming from women on the same planet! Every story needs to be heard, acknowledged, and amplified, no woman should be confined to the realities of another. Until we choose to recognize that every woman has a different experince with the hijab, we will be forced to continue to see the hijab being misunderstood across the world.

Thank you for reading this far in my first blog, join the discussion leave a comment sharing what you think and spark a discussion. How has your experience with the hijab shaped your view on the hijab? How will you begin to acknowledge the stories of other women and their hijab?

~Lubna M